You’ve been married for 5 years. Your spouse comes home from work and leaves their coat on the chair even though they know it drives you nuts not to just put it in the closet. Then they bring up the furniture. This is the other argument you’ve been having for as long as you can remember. You want to keep it. They want to get rid of it. It never ends.
Sound familiar? Often times couples find themselves having the same arguments throughout the life of their relationship. This is not uncommon. In fact, when individuals join lives it is to be expected that there will be a difference of opinion in how they live. No two people are the same. What can make all the difference is how these disagreements are handled.
Some topics are just not worth arguing about. Some are extremely meaningful. Some are worthy of trying to find a compromise. Some are just simply about vocalizing concern about an issue and receiving validation from your spouse that even if nothing changes they can understand why it’s important to you. Happy couples, whether naturally or with the help of a therapist, are able to easily distinguish between all of the above and knowing which arguments are worth having.
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